Sunday, January 23, 2011

Dancing in the Minefields- Part 2

Along with my last post, I wanted to take some time to recollect the positive things I have experienced (or hope to) through my struggles with infertility. It is often so easy to focus on the negative in all of this and get down on ourselves or our situation. Sometimes we need reminders that there is some 'good' in all of our 'bad'.

+I have learned to rely on God. Trust in Him. Have hope through Him. Get strength from Him.
+As a commenter from my last post helped me to realize, God is suffering with us. He did not give us this trial out of anger. He loves us and is grieving with us. We are not alone. And that is comforting.
+My relationship with Colin has grown. After various embarrassing/exposing doctor's visits, there are no secrets left! Hehe. I have been able to focus on Colin and strengthening our bond so we can be better parents someday.
+We have baby names picked out, nurseries planned, rules made, schools picked out...we'll have nothing left to plan when God sends us our baby! Ha! Maybe this is a little exaggerated, but ever since we started TTC, babies have been 'all' I've thought about at times. Now, I try not to 'dream' too much, but at least I'm a few steps ahead of the game, right?
+I have been more cautious about my health. I still need to think about my body being a possible future home for a baby for 9 months. I need to give it proper nutrition and exercise so I am healthy.
+I know SO much more about my body. Who knew women were this complex?!?
+My patience has expanded. This is difficult for Type A me! I want things all lined up the way I want them. 4 years later...well...I guess God is still trying to teach me to get better at this!
+I have learned that I need to relax more. Laze around and read a book. Meet friends. Be outside. Take walks. Just. Be.
+When we do finally get pregnant/adopt, I think it will be so much sweeter for us. We've worked so hard and done so many silly things that we just 'knew' would get us pregnant, that we will be all the more thankful for our baby.
+I have met all you wonderful women. It has been a beautiful blessing for me to lean on you all and also to hopefully lift you up when you need it most.

This journey sure can feel like a minefield, but let's take a moment to dance through the journey. Want to join me??


  1. You are so right! We tend to focus on the negative because it beats us down so hard! Thanks for the positive reminders. Praying that your miracle will come soon!

  2. thank you for stopping by my blog today.

    you have a very healthy and positive attitude about your struggle to have children, I know so many women who only concentrate on the negative aspects, it kind of drives me crazy. There is always some good to be seen, but they can't see it.

  3. I love this post. I keep an ongoing list of the postives that come from IF, and it's pretty similar to yours! I look at it when I'm feeling sad or frustrated. This perspective is so important! Thanks for sharing.

  4. Hey Jess,
    I just found your blog through Ann...It was such a blessing to read your blog today! What an encouragement! I am looking forward to following your journey:)

  5. Great reflections :) And yes, infertility is exactly like trying to dance in a minefield!

  6. I keep tossing around a post about why I love IF. Not tongue in cheek at all, but about this community, the love we've found, the strengths we've discovered. This post touches on much of that.

    And may I ask where that image at the top of the post is from? I COVET. As in I want a big version of it. To hang over my bed or something. It strikes a nerve with me, in a good way. Please share!

  7. Hi Jess, thanks for visiting my blog and commenting. God's view of suffering is so different from the world's. He uses it to grow us and to bring Himself glory. Lately I can't help but think of Romans 5:3-5 : "(we) rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us" It's so counter-cultural that we would find blessing in the midst of infertility, but you're so right in counting the many ways it has added to your life - even in those ways you would least expect!

  8. Some wonderful reminders. I really appreciate this post!!

    Much love,
    Future Mama

  9. Thanks ladies!

    The picture off the top of my post was from yahoo images. I typed in dancing and this one popped up. I was drawn to it. Beautiful image.

    Romans 5:3-5 is a great verse!!

  10. I left you an award on my blog!

  11. It is nice to take a break and enjoy in all of the blessings we do have! So glad you are able to "dance" once in a while!

  12. I'm so glad I found your blog! :) This scripture from your last post really touched me very deeply - "Then I would still have this consolation--my joy in unrelenting pain--that I had not denied the words of the Holy One." ~Job 6:10 *hugs* Thank you for being so open, here. I can't wait to get to know you better! :)

  13. Jess, I am very thankful you stopped by my blog, so that I could do the same. You are a beautiful design of God, and it's amazing the way you share through your blog. Keep letting your light shine, even in "dark" times- then they won't be so dark! :)