Sunday, November 14, 2010

Waiting vs. Life

After writing my post yesterday about being stuck in a rut waiting for something instead of living and fully embracing life, I found this quote in a magazine:

"While you're waiting for later, you accidentally metamorphose into a person who orders half portions and lives a half life." ~Melanie Gideon

Who wants to live a half life? I want a life full of Life! I want to give 100%. To me, Life means staying true to God's plan for me. Not wasting my time with earthly things, but devoting myself to my Creator and my purpose.

This reminds me of the song Two Hands by Jars of Clay. The lyrics are:

I use one hand to pull closer
The other to push you away
If I had two hands doing the same thing
Lifted high, lifted high

I have heard this song many times, but I find it interesting looking at the lyrics. What I find thought-provoking is that the writer doesn't finish the thought. There is an "if" but not a "then" in this stanza. It lets me think about what would happen to my life if I gave both hands, my all, to God. Later in the song, this stanza is sung:

And if we just keep digging we can reach the foundation
Of our souls
And if we just keep cutting all the chains from our hearts
We’ll lose control

Lose control? That doesn't sound good....but no, we must give up control to let God control. We must break the chains that are holding us back from letting go and letting God.

Random infertility story:
I have been taking prescription prenatal pills since July. Two months ago, I started a 3-month prescription of birth control pills to regulate my cycles and hormones, and hopefully get rid of my ovarian cysts. Well, it happened that I ran out of both at the same time, so I went to our local Walgreens to get the prescriptions refilled. Nothing was said when we dropped them off. Colin and I went in to pick them up an hour later, and the pharmacist wanted to talk to me. I don't know what kind of trick he thought I was pulling, but he questioned me because of the contradiction of birth control pills and prenatal pills. Did he think I was going to sell the birth control pills? I believe my doctor that prescribed them to me told me that women are supposed to begin taking prenatal pills well before they get pregnant, so I would think that I'm not the first person buying both at the same time. I just wanted to point to my husband to the pharmacist and say, "He's a police officer. I'm not doing anything illegal." But no, I had to explain to him in front of other customers and pharmacy techs that I have PCOS and the pills are temporary to get rid of cysts. Anyways, it is never fun having infertility, but sometimes others magnify this for you, and it's unfortunate. Won't it be a nice day when (and if) we don't have to deal with infertility anymore?


  1. Eeek! How tough to have to explain yourself to the pharmacist and whatever Walgreens patient happened to be around.

    I have been thinking about your post. I had a moment yesterday when I was enjoying my husband and my dogs and I just treasured that moment and felt that my life was full right now.

  2. How aggravating!!! I had a simpler experience awhile ago. It is so annoying to have to get into all of that when you just want to take your medicine and go hide in the ground. I'm taking prenatals too and I have progesterone to force a visit with AF. totally looks like I like to abort healthy's what I do.

  3. I love that song! I can't believe you had to explain that, to basically the whole pharmacy :) I'm glad my comment helped the other day! Please let me know if there's anything I can do to help! Praying for you!

  4. I know what you mean about waiting, vs. life. Thanks for sharing that quote - it is so true. Often, I have to remind myself to just enjoy our life NOW and be content with what we have NOW, instead of just pining away for something we can't have right now. Lord help us to be content! I was hesitant to get a new job (I recently graduated from nurse practitioner school), being afraid I would get pregnant and wouldn't be able to take maternity leave. Well, I've finally realized I can't live my life just waiting around to get pregnant. So, I accepted a new position this week!